The Virtue Of Virtues ~ Grade Five Through Eight Morality Based ~ Seven Lesson ~ CCD ~ Home School ~ Parents Teach At Home Curriculum

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When sex education classes were introduced into public school systems across the United States of America back in the 1990s, parents asked me to write a book to help parents and their grade five through eight children, so they could have a more value-based teaching to present to their young ones. I also had a sixth grader coming through the school at that time, and other of my children to follow. I agreed and authored The Virtue of Virtues, which I taught at Sacred Heart of Jesus Parish in Hopedale, Massachusetts, in the Diocese of Worcester.

Some of the sex education textbooks I’d seen in public schools asked the sixth grade children in their sex education class when was that the last time they had sex; and promoted products on the best condoms and gels to use for their own protection. While using the best condoms and the best gels might be beneficial to preventing them from getting certain diseases, the premise that all the sixth graders were having sex was inaccurate. Not only was it inaccurate, it was undermining what many parents had been, and to this day, are teaching about morality. Schools were usurping parental authority on what morals ought to be taught to their children.

Schools across the country had D.A.R.E. ~ Just Say No Program to help students combat the drug and alcohol epidemic sweeping through schools of all kinds of socio-economic  status. But when it came to underage kids being sexually active, there were no protections put in place for those children who did not want to, or choose not to have sex. Teaching about condoms, gels and abortions as the means to prevent unwanted pregnancies was apparently the way to go.

What about the sexually abused student?

Would condoms, gels and abortions be the remedy for them if they got pregnant?

What about the 12-year-old girl or boy who did not want to have sex with another student, teacher, or other adult?

Would condoms, gels and abortions be the remedy for these students as well?

Of course not.

I attended the next school council meeting in order to present parent concerns over these issues. However, peer pressure does not only stop with children in school. It became apparent that sex education classes were here to stay. What the school council did decide to do was to go along with the newly created Massachusetts Education Reform Act of 1993. The Town of Hopedale voted me in as one of the 2 parents in the town. On that civic board, I was voted in as co-chairperson along with the elementary school principal.

At the first board meeting, I suggested that part of the education reform ought to include a course on ethics to go along with the sex education program. In that way, children without a voice would be able to use the program (which was yet to be written) to better be able to stand up for themselves and not be pushed into going along with the crowd if they did not want to go along with them. The free will of the children was being usurped.

“We need to have a course on ethics to go along with the sex education program,” I said to the board.

“But whose ethics would we teach?” was the quick comeback from the school principal.

I realized at that moment that this public school would not allow certain ethics or particular kinds of morality to be taught in the public schools. They did teach not to steal other children’s lunch money, not to fight on the playground, and not to disrespect the teacher, but somehow teaching about the morality of protecting their own person as being private to each student was beyond the comprehension.

Morality as a subject in the public school curriculum was not addressed. I told the board that this material is the role of the parents to address with their children, not the public school system. The principal told me that since many homes were now single parent homes, and that many parents were not teaching this subject to their children, the role of sex education would now fall to the schools. I withdrew my children from this amoral sex education curriculum and taught them myself.

That’s when I knew had to write The Virtue of Virtues. It is a grade five – eight, virtue-based morality curriculum designed to be incorporated into existing CCD parish programs. I taught it to sixth-graders. The seven lessons may be taught once each month during the CCD year or in a seven-week block from October to December at the start of the CCD year. Both methods have proven to be successful.

Parents can also use this organized approach to teach virtues to their children, since The Virtue of Virtues may be taught one hour each night for one week, once a week for seven weeks, or once a month for seven months. Parents have the opportunity to teach their children individually or in a comfortable setting with other parents and children.

My job since 1977 to that point was writing for a newspaper, The Milford Daily News (under the name Linda Kearsley), as a reporter and feature story writer for the neighboring Town of Mendon. I decided to answer the six questions every reporter needs to ask for a complete story: What?, Why?, How?, When?, Who? and Where?.

The What? section of each chapter refers to a current day fiction story, which deals with the lesson theme, and is followed by the Why? section that asks questions. How? is a written activity. When? opens the scriptures for the students, while Who? illustrates the message is meant for them. Each lesson concludes with Where? calling students to act out their faith here and now.

This book is written with much love for our youth. Each of the seven lessons leads children to seek out God, who loves them, and to live out the virtues, as a way of returning their love for God.

The seven chapters are:

1. Theological Virtues
A. Faith
B. Hope
C. Love

2. Cardinal Virtues
A. Prudence
B. Justice
C. Fortitude
D. Temperance

3. Fruits Of The Holy Spirit
A. Charity (Love)
B. Joy
C. Peace
D. Patience
E. Kindness
F. Goodness
G. Endurance
H. Mildness
I. Faith
J. Modesty
K. Restraint
L. Chastity

4. Seven Capital Sins
A. Pride
B. Covetousness (Greed)
C. Lust
D. Anger
E. Gluttony
F. Envy
G. Sloth

5. The Opposite Virtues
A. Humility
B. Generosity
C. Chastity
D. Meekness
E. Temperance
F. Brotherly Love
G. Diligence

6. Friendship
A. Mutual Respect
B. Sincerity
C. Loyalty
D. Faithfulness
E. Honesty
F. Purity
G. Self-esteem

7. Decision Making
A. Free Will
B. Coercion
C. Responsibility
D. Exploitation
E. Peer Pressure
F. Character

Teacher’s Objectives for each class are explained in the Appendix. Parents will also benefit from the Appendix at the conclusion of the book, which includes references to today’s Catechism of the Catholic Church dealing with virtues.

If there ever was a time when moral courage was on trial, it is today. We can do much to foster virtues in our youth, and in the process, strengthen these same virtues within ourselves. Virtues are the first stepping stones leading to mature character development.

I used to go to spiritual direction at that time from the late Bishop George Rueger, at the time I wrote this book. He asked me, “Which of the virtues do you think is the most important?”

I thought for a moment and answered, “I would have to say wisdom.”

“But you know wisdom is not a virtue, right?”

“I know. But without wisdom, I would not know which virtue to choose,” I answered.

“That is very wise,” he said.

In our daily lives, how could anyone pick just one virtue? Sometimes even as adults we need the virtue of fortitude to do the right thing in the face of unpopular vices, while another time the virtue of love in the face of hate is the only remedy. We need to pray about this, for ourselves, as well as for our children and grandchildren. It is not too late. It is never too late to teach about virtues and ethics.

Let us not shy away from teaching virtues to our children. Not one of us is perfect. We begin, or begin again, right where we are. Let us bloom where we are planted, in the garden of our homes, families, neighborhoods and parishes. This is a positive step we can take to instill wholesome goodness in a world in want and need of virtues.

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God Bless Everyone Everywhere

Whose Ethics? Now Is The Time ~ What Do You Stand For?

When I was co-chairperson of the Massachusetts Education Reform Act of 1993, I suggested introducing an ethics class to go along with the newly accepted sex-education course that was being taught to that year’s sixth graders. The answer I got back was, “Whose ethics?”

That answer, as if it were a viable one, is what stood between teaching with and without ethics.

Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines ethics as: “the discipline with what is good and bad, and with moral duty and obligation.”

The other answer I got at that same meeting was, “If we teach morality, whose morality should we teach?”

We see this today on the world stage, as if different sides can interpret ethics and morality differently.

We see this in the movie and television world, where each year, we reach certain tolerance levels addressing crime, violence and bloodshed. Once those limits are set, it seems more detailed crime, violence, and bloodshed is required to maintain the status quo of an increasingly bloodthirsty audience.

We see this in the ever-infringement on innocent youth for the invading and decending language, as well as inappropriate dress, as if it is normal to send prepubescent students to school in the same clothing as ladies of the night.

The government of the United States of America is also not unaffected by sweeping away ethics and morality, claiming immorality as morality, unethical behaviors as ethical behaviors, lies as truth, and always claiming that it is “the other guy” who is lying, even when videos and facts prove otherwise.

Remember, even Pilate asked the famous question, “What is truth?” We all ask this same question when we do not like what we are hearing, and have our own agenda.

What do you stand for?

Do you close your eyes to dishonest practices because they serve you in some way?

Do you sell out your integrity for the bottom line?

Is your political career more important than the lives you hold in your hand with the swipe of your pen?

Do you have any part of playing God by separating children and babies from their parents, putting all of them in cages, those who are seeking refuge at our borders?

Do you make yourself complicit in human trafficking by selling stolen children from their parents and selling them through adoption agencies?

Do you mandate SARS CoV2 (COVID-19) numbers be sent to the US Health and Human Services, which are said to be manipulated into more palateable numbers for public consumption, rather than mandating they be sent to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) for accurate expert, medical opinion and dissemination?

Do you close your eyes to global warming and climate change because you receive some benefit of money or endorsements?

Do you listen to medical doctors or pharmacological companies in your decision making process?

Do you trample upon the Constitution of the United States, and what the Statue of Liberty stands for as imprinted on her base, “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breath free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me. I lift my lamp beside the golden door.”

Do you stack the Supreme Court with judges who truly serve justice blindly, remembering Lady Justice wears a blindfold signifying that justice is truly blind when it comes to race, skin color, ethnic background, gender, age, ability, or disability?

Do you stand for equal pay for equal work, regardless of people of different race, skin color, ethnic background, gender, age, ability, or disability?

Do you value people over things?

Where do you spend your money?

Where do you spend your time?

What do you think about?

Where you spend your thoughts, time and money; there is where your heart is.

Each of us, whether we are in public office and have a direct ability to make just laws for all citizens, or whether we are citizens making a living at our life’s work, or even currently without work or home, we can all take in the news of the day and create more just and civil societies right where we are.

The recipe for our life may need to change depending upon the variables at hand. We can always use our free will to uplift rather than put down, heal rather than inflict pain, listen rather than ignore pleas for help, listen without an answer running (which is not listening), and feed the poor rather than close our eyes to the plight of hungry humans.

Giving and receiving are two sides of the same coin. Sometimes it seems easier to give than receive. But receiving is necessary for balance of greed running rampant. It is odd that those who truly are in need of receiving have a harder time receiving what they need, as opposed to the wealthiest among us, not in need, who seek to usurp receiving to fill their gluttonous desires.

Bloom where you are planted, even if you are the only one blooming.

Namaste

Virtues Mean Good Habits ~ Part II ~ From Eight To Twelve Years Old

Targeted teaching of the virtues, which is beneficial for all areas of human and social settings, is best learned

Children from ages eight to twelve need the balance that a life of virtues provides.

as a child growing up. It is always better to learn character education along the way as a child as opposed to unlearning bad habits later on as an adult. Compare this concept to children learning sports. It is far better to learn how to throw, hit and field a baseball rather than to pick up wrong moves that can result that can injure a player for life. It is a well-balanced life we are seeking to teach our young ones.

From eight to twelve years old, children are mentally and emotionally ready to learn:

• Fortitude
• Perseverance
• Industriousness
• Patience
• Responsibility
• Justice
• Generosity

As with building any building, if we have not yet laid the firm foundation (from the previous post) of teaching our children the virtues of obedience, sincerity and order, then attempting to add the weight of the seven virtues mentioned above will be built upon shaky ground. It is better to go back and focus time and energy on teaching obedience, sincerity and order for them to better understand this lesson.

As children grow into puberty with all of its biological changes, it is important for them to develop their will, so as to strengthen their character. Children at this age begin making more of their own personal decisions and need the criteria in order to know whether their their efforts are going in the right direction.

According to David Isaacs, author of A Guide for Parents And Teachers CHARACTER BUILDING, “It is logical for children of this age to focus more on what they are doing, on the action itself, than on the person at the receiving end of the action. They are not yet very aware of their own intimacy. This is the stage when we should try to get children to keep things not out of obedience, but rather for the satisfaction of managing to overcome some obstacle. This is the age for challenging targets (but reasonable targets). Just as the small child is very aware of the rules of the game when playing with his companions and in general in his relationships with others, it is surely good to stimulate children to develop virtues out of a sense of duty towards their companions, for example, but without forgetting to enthuse them with a worthwhile ideal. In this way they will get the satisfaction that comes from making an effort to overcome themselves.”

As parents and teachers, how do you and I put up with annoying things? How do you and I go about continually putting in the effort to give to others? How do you and I go about attaining what we set out to achieve? How do you and I resist evil influences? These are the life events that need the solutions of fortitude, perseverance, industriousness, patience, responsibility, justice and generosity.

“To do all these things they need to set their sights high and not be content with mean ideals,” Isaacs says.

“Aiming high” means raising children’s sights up towards God. This allows children to broaden their horizons. Teaching children these human virtues helps them to develop their faith. Since all of the virtues mentioned are interconnected, it is not as confusing as it might seem by looking at these seven virtues, built upon the three previous virtues. They are all interwoven.

Using any of the situations life presents to them, all of these virtues can come into play. You and I can shine a light on these virtues, and ask them how they think, using these virtues as tools, they can skillfully work towards their desired goal.

“Where a child focuses one one or two of them, he is likely to improve also in the others,” Isaacs says.

As we watch our children blossom from the bud of a child to an opening flower of their adolescence, their own intimacy awakens in them, sparking in them the deeper understanding that they can now to do things by their own initiative. Knowing this, children are able to make a commitment to themselves, by their own decisions. They continuing learning cause and effect, the basis for justice for their thoughts, words and actions.

Parents wishing for a fun book to teach virtues to their children ages ten to fourteen can go to:

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God Bless

Teaching The Virtue of Virtues ~ Moral Courage Is On Trial ~ This Book and Curriculum Is Copyrighted

If there ever was a time when moral courage was on trial, it is today. We can do much to foster virtues in our youth, and in the process, strengthen these same virtues within ourselves. Virtues are the first stepping stones leading to mature character development. Practicing the virtues keeps men, women and children healthy in mind, body and spirit.

Virtues are the missing link in the fabric of societies all over the world today. Now is a good time to get back to the common sense of the virtues.

Why do virtues matter?

Virtues in society do what baking soda does for cake recipes. It makes them rise. Have you ever made a cake without any rising ingredient? It will flop, like society today, which is attempting to live, think, speak, see, hear and act many times without one thought to virtue. We seem to make important decisions based on other factors.

How many times have we dulled our senses, or dulled our consciences, or traded our once strong faith for a placebo of materialism, consumerism, or political or financial gain? So many times we trade the virtue in how we speak dress, treat others, or act, mistakenly thinking reasons other than virtues is what we ought to base our decisions on.

Where did we go wrong?

We took our eyes off the real prize.

Do we remember the days of our parents and grandparents, many of whom were not considered to be among the top one percent of wealth earners of their day?

Do we remember what it was like not to have what other children had in school?

Do we remember hand-me-down clothes or clothes bought from the local thrift shop?

These, among a host of other realities some may wish to forget as an embarrassment, can serve as the spark that fuels the materialistic and consumeristic drive to do and have better things.

What is the real prize for Christians today?

It is the same as it has always been. The real prize of Christians is our undying faith in Jesus Christ, who leads us IN VIRTUE to God, His Father, graced by His Holy Spirit, through the open door of the VIRTUOUS Blessed Mother Mary. We need to remember that it was God the Father who chose Mary as the way to introduce His Son to the world. This is more than the Christmas story.

Jesus is the perfect example of living the virtues: faith, hope, love, prudence, temperance, fortitude and justice. This is what we need to be teaching our children, and re-introducing in our daily living. All of the Beatitudes, taught by Jesus at the Sermon on the Mount, are based on the virtues.

Let us not shy away from teaching virtues to our children. Not one of us is perfect. We begin, or begin again, right where we are. Let us bloom where we are planted, in the garden of our homes, families, neighborhoods, schools and parishes. This is a positive step we can take to instill wholesome goodness in a world in want and need of virtues.

The Virtue of Virtues is now out in its second printing, and is available at:

https://www.iuniverse.com/en/bookstore/bookdetails/809142-the-virtue-of-virtues

Healing A Nation ~ Repairing Broken Relationships

Hanging onto personal preferences over finding common ground that is mutually beneficial to all is like the white-knuckling grip of the fist hanging on for dear life from a branch overhanging the jagged, steep cliff. It’s a stupid idea that does not work in the end.

Whether we’re talking about repairing relationships with families, friends, neighbors, schools, cities and towns, our own or other country’s politics, or other social settings; repairing relationships takes concerted effort, but it is possible.

We form our opinions, ideas, goals and judgments with the precision ice skaters use when sharpening their blades. It is effective. Ice skaters use their sharp edges to cut through the ice at will to jump, turn and perform outlandish moves. We do the same thing with our opinions, thoughts, words and actions. Now is the time to melt our own sharp edges, using our own will to better serve us in healing the rifts in humanity that we have caused. Maybe we did not personally cause the rift in humanity, or whatever the dysfunction is in our corner of the world. But that does not mean we cannot be part of the healing, repairing relationships process.

Whatever we focus on grows, no matter which subject it is. Focusing on division keeps everyone in division. Focusing on healing relationships works, whether it is personal or social, as in work related issues, or the politics that is tearing nations apart.

Why not focus on healing the relationship and healing the nation?

This is the team building approach. It works in our jobs, schools, clubs, anywhere we want to work together productively to get things done. Finding what is wrong with every different idea, or attempt at success if it is not our idea, and highlighting the faults of everyone involved does not make for a sturdy foundation on which to build. That would be paramount to erecting our building in sand. It will crumble, of course.

Always arguing and proving we are right (even when we are not) is an exhausting way to live, or function in any realm of society. It is detrimental to repairing any broken relationship, no matter if we are the one in the wrong, or not. We all know this. This is nothing new. We need to move past pride, personal pride, political pride, social pride, as if that pride is the cord that cannot be broken. The truth is, that cord is the very thing that is choking the oxygen out of the will to heal and advance common interests.

We can talk ourselves into a willfully ignorant and self-sabotaging mindset when we are hell bent on getting our own way at all costs. Such an approach as we are seeing on more than one political stage serves very few at the extreme expense of the many.

What is the best way to mend fences, build bridges, and repair broken relationships?

First, we need the desire to do so. Not mending fences, building bridges and repairing relationships only hurts us, not the other person or group. Paradoxically, this requires an honest effort void of only focusing on self-serving interests. One would initially think that by seeking only what we want will get us to where we want to be. This is not true. We see this exact thing play out in other people’s lives, but have a much harder time in recognizing this fact in our own life or political goals. It is always easier to see the faults of others, rather than our own faults, or the ramifications of our own poor decisions. We spend an inordinate amount of time doing just that. It would serve us better if we do like the sitcom “Friends” when Chandler tells Joey, “Get there quicker.”

Second, we need to focus on finding common ground. It is possible to work together for a common goal. Not working together for a common goal is like watching two-year-old children who throw temper tantrums because they have not yet advanced in maturity and in their thinking skills to realize there is a better way of communicating. It is a sad state of affairs when adults act like two-year-old children to get our way. These adult tantrums are also a bully mentality tactic, to manipulate systems and people to achieving self-serving goals. It might seem obvious that we all should not be bullies, nor allow ourselves to be bullied, but even schools are having a hard time in effectively dealing with bullies. There are legal and humane ways to stand up to bullies that do not result with rewarding the bully. We simply need the fortitude, integrity and courage to use our God-given free will to use our voice and stand up for our convictions.

Thirdly, we need to realize living our lives is not the same thing as playing a strategic game of Risk or Monopoly. Real lives, ours and others, are affected negatively when we live our lives like a chess game. Lives are not meant to be lived under microscopes, carved out with exacto knives. If we are going to make decisions affecting other people, we need to take into consideration all people whose lives we affect, not just our own, or only people who think the way we do.

Fourthly, we need to realize what is the motivating force behind our decisions. Is greed the only worthwhile motivating force to determine a life well-lived? If the bottom line is that there is money to be made at the end of the day, or at the end of the transaction, is that a good enough reason to hurt or harm others, or sell out our countries? Is this the paradigm we wish to make decisions by? Is money the only reason to do any and everything? Are other factors just as important as money?

Fifthly, we need to stop playing games, willfully duping ourselves and others. When we speak with a forked tongue, we know we can then go back to say we covered all our bases. Manipulating truth so it is conveniently contorted, lying, cheating and stealing ought not to be the highest goal to achieve, or to be not counted as evil if we can get away with doing it. If we raise the moral standard to all our lives, all our lives will benefit.

We do not have to do any of these suggestions. It is possible to keep on the path we are on. It is possible to thoroughly destroy our planet and force it into cataclysmic, life-ending cycles. We can chose to lose democracies in the world by ignoring democratic principles as if they are the same thing totalitarian ideals, which oddly enough is exactly what we will get when we give up on democracy. We can close our eyes to the realities we do not wish to look at or address because it bothers our peace of mind to think about. We can do nothing and hand over our own responsibilities to other people in order to blame them for all the evils of the world, as long as the world exists.

What is evil?

Evil is the result of events when good people do nothing. The biggest dupe of all is the most successful trick Satan has accomplished in this world, which is, the lie that he does not exist.

God Bless